Sunset Joywalk Dongtan Beach – Google+ Embed!

Learning My Blogging Skills

Ladies and Gentlemen I’m just learning by leaps and bounds, today’s accomplishment is embedding Google Plus posts into my blog. Last time it was FaceBook posts. Because WordPress is just too complicated for my simple brain, I’m trying other things.

More people see my FaceBook posts, but adding Google Plus posts raises my SEO on Google Searches. So you can expect to see more of both kinds right here on Photojimsf.com.


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Daily Routine

These pictures are typical of my daily routine in Jomtien Beach, Thailand. I’m such a late riser it’s usually past lunchtime by the time I find a good cheap breakfast. Today was a quick bowl of thin rice noodle soup with pork balls, fish cake, and ground chicken, a pinch of the four Thai condiments: sugar, chili powder, vinegar, and fish sauce. A few greens added. Just 40 baht ($1.33) at a roadside stand.

Caged Parakeet

Next I might grab a massage at the Thai Blind Massage Institute. A one hour Thai massage is 180 baht, I tip the reception 20, and the masseur 100. About $9 total! Tea or coffee is given afterwards out on the front porch, where you can relax and chat with the caged parakeet.

No Cutie Pies Today

It’s late afternoon by this time so I might head to the beach for a sunset joy walk and photo adventure. I try to see how many cute guys I can convince to be photographed, but today was pretty slow on that count. The weather was just perfect, about 80 degrees f and lightly breezy.

That’s The Spirit!

The highlight of this joywalk was a cluster of spirit houses near the far northern end of the beach. Spirit houses are similar in concept to the Mexican Deo de los Muertos altars which honor the dead. In Thailand they’re also meant to give them a place to hang out, eat, drink, relax, and pray. Placed outside and away from people, they hopefully distract the spirits from haunting those that are still living.

Krap, Khun Krap

Thanks for tuning in, I hope you come back again and again.

Jimbo

For more fairy tales from afar, check out my YouTube channel: Photojimsf

Photo Adventure Of The Day – Facebook Embed Test!

Ladies and gentlemen wow! I learned a new skill today, how to embed FaceBook posts into my WordPress photo adventures blog. I’m just so excited to now be able to share with you more of my kooky stories and photos. WordPress is really just such a pain, this way is so much easier. Click on any of pictures on the FaceBook embed to see a larger version. Most of them have a caption or description, I hope you find them interesting.

Afterwards, please come back and read the trashy bonus story below? Thanks so much, krup Khun krup.

To thank you for taking the extra effort to visit my blog, here’s a few bonus tidbits about today’s photo adventures.

December 4, 2012; mostly in the late dinner portion of the evening.

I needed some ibuprofen and had googled a pharmacy with a good rep that didn’t overcharge farangs. No name, just “the one next to the Kiss Market” in Rompho Plaza, a big, sleazy girlie beer bar complex popular with the Australian tourists.

I knew exactly where it was, (not what you’re probably thinking right now) because a dear expat pal took me to the Curry Hut, one of the best Indian restaurants I’ve ever tried. It’s tucked between two of those bars on the right hand side long warehouse portion of the plaza.

The pharmacy is tucked in between the Kiss Market and a long row of beauty salons in the left hand side long warehouse portion. $4 for a month’s supply. I couldn’t tell you if that’s a good deal or not it seemed reasonable and I bought it.

I also needed a haircut, and my higher power, Google, told me the best deal was to be found right there in sleazy Rompho Plaza. There were about a dozen places to choose from. Most had a published price of 130 to 150 baht for man haircut. All of them were actually women’s beauty salons, staffed by women who could just as easily worked the beer bars.

Google said there were several actual old style barber shops staffed by old men who charged only 70 baht for haircut and shave. That’s about $2.50 $3 at the most. Well, even higher powers can be wrong, I could not find the old man barbershop.

Hmmmmmm, well, 150 baht is just $5, not such a big deal, but the idea of sitting in a cathouse full of idle women talking about me in Thai and/or trying to marry me? I just wasn’t feeling it.

The last shop on the row was open air facing away from all the others, with a half dozen girls sitting just outside on a picnic table. When I got within full view of the shop, guess what? There was a hot, 30 something (that means 45 in Thai years) man barber shaving the angel face of another Thai twenty something (30). My luck has changed!

Well — not so fast. Just as soon as I approached, the loud, screeching and cackling bar girls hairdressers at the pic nic table pounced on me like hookers snagging a John.

“Can I wait for him?”

“Yes can do sit sit” Grabbing me by the arms and dragging me to an empty chair.

“How many baht?”

“Yes can do sit sit!”

“All I want is a clip clip zero guard all over” Motioning my nearly bald head and thickly shadowed face.

“Yes yes can do sit sit!” Pushing me into the chair.

I’m looking at the handsome barber and he motions me to sit sit.

So then, the scraggliest hooker hairdresser, skinny as a rail, bad teeth, iodine hair with plenty of dark root, pulls out the clippers and starts on my head. Dammit! I’m bamboozled again. The girls are hooting and hollering with each other, probably about me.

She does a pretty decent job on top. I mean, how hard can a zero guard all the way down haircut be, right? Halfway through, she says it’s 150. I try to bargain her down, but she’s not budging, and her posse is helping her out by drowning me out with loud belly laughs and gossip. What evah.

Then she pulls out the straight razor. It’s the last thing I want at this point. “Oh! Just zero guard all over please?” She gives me a strange look, and then laughs. They laugh.

“Ok can do.” She proceeds to do a lousy job on my face, and then cuts my neck with the clippers! Blood trickling down onto my Tommy Hilfiger shirt (that had already been washed in hot water with my black jeans in Cambodia, no phrobulum).

“Oh! Solly solly meesta.” The hens are whispering and discreetly pointing. She dabs the wound with some anti-septic (little ouchie) on a cotton bud. They don’t call them swabs, they’re buds. I like it.

Out comes the razor again. “I fix faw yoo this much betteure.” Jesus Buddha Christ! I hoped the alms I’d given to that gorgeous monk in the morning would be enough merit to protect me from further harm. I take a deep breath, close my eyes, cast my fate in Buddha’s hands and let her finish.

She was pretty good with the razor, much better than with the clippers. But she only touched up the edges around the back and the ears. Left the half job on my face and neck alone, thank God. It was all pretty quick, and when it was over I could not have leapt out of that chair any faster.

I paid her the 150 with exact change, experience has taught me well. “Oh you no tip faw me?” she’s trying to work me with the sad puppy dog eyes.

“Solly hunnee cannot, almost cut my head off” giggle giggle frown frown. I cut off that line pretty quick by taking her aside, and whispering in her ear:

“That your boyfriend?” motioning towards the hot barber guy.

“Noooo, not boyfriend.” Says it loudly for all to hear. The girls are craning their necks with their cat ears perked in our direction.

“That your brother?” I say a bit louder. The posse is whispering almost as loud as I’m talking.

“Nooooo not brother!” She’s forgotten about the non-tip.

“He have darling already?” I motion again to the barber, who’s half smirking half frowning. He knows what’s coming next.

“Ohhhhhhhh! You like man! You want him?” I’m nodding enthusiastically. He’s blushing. The guy in the chair is now laughing.

“Well he is pretty handsome. How many baht?” The din of the peanut gallery starts to rise.

“Ok, can do! Yes can do too, I go with yoo, two for one!” She throws her arms around me.

“Ok how much you pay me? I cheap cheap!” I’m sticking my hand out to her, palm up, fingers waving, other hand on hip. I’m channeling my best hooker on the corner pose. The place erupts, nearly blowing the roof off the chicken coop.

I bend over, and give her a nice kiss on her neck, and exit stage left, blood stain dried and head still attached. I can still hear them hollering halfway down the road, which is where most of these pictures were taken.

Moral of the story: unless you have a rock solid recommend from someone who goes regularly, do not, DO NOT! Go to those beauty salons that claim to also cut men’s hair. I had a similar experience at a salon in Siem Reap, Cambodia. I’ll tell you all about the bloody hack job a pedicurist gave my toes. Another time. Stay tuned.

Hello Kitty car!

Welcome back to Jimbos Fairy Tales From Afar! Here’s a quick post, I am testing the new WordPress app for Android.

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I was so amused by the hello kitty merchandise at Taiwan Airport, so I looked it up on Wikipedia.

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Turns out it’s a global miracle branding and merchandising phenomena worth over five billion dollars.

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It’s based on a cartoon character of a Japanese bobtail cat named Kitty White. Notice she has no mouth?

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Anyhow, stay tuned to this post, I will spruce it up and had finishing touches when I can get to my desktop. Right now I’m just too exhausted from all the fun here at Dongtan Beach, Thailand.

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Wish You Were Heeeeeeeeeere…

Relaxation Vacation

I wish all of my friends, including you, my devoted viewers, could join me on my relaxation adventure here on Dongtan Beach, near Pattaya, Thailand. I’m staying at the extremely affordable ($21 a night) DD Inn Guesthouse, just 50 feet off the beach. My typical day consists of waking up around noon, slaving away at my blog, or hanging out at the air conditioned Tuk Com or Central Festival shopping malls where I feast on ice creams and gelatos.

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When the heat breaks, around 4 or 5 pm, I take my new Samsung Galaxy S4 Google Play unlocked international version for a photo adventure on the beach. The goal is to see how many cute guys I can get to let me take their picture.

The Farangs Have Gone

In this video, I’m Having a cold Singha, the national beer of Thailand, in the lime green chairs section. The weather is extremely pleasant, a balmy 85 Fahrenheit. Most of the ugly farangs have gone already, except me, 555 (Thai slang for hahaha, or lol).

What’s left are mostly the concession workers, gorgeous local boys, packing up the chairs and tables, and raking the sand clean of stray trash. The sound of them joking, laughing, and giggling like little schoolgirls is music to my ears. They’re generally quite friendly and eager to have me sit in their section, and ham and pose for as many pictures as I like. There’s even a stray dog at the end who comes over to say hello.

Sorry You Couldn’t Join Me

Since your not sitting here right next to me, thank you so much for dropping in and letting me share this pleasurable sunset moment. Be sure to subscribe, so you can be the first to see my photo adventures as they unfold right here on my splashy photo blog.

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Virtual Pushcart

Please visit my virtual pushcart of Thai books, movies, travel guides, and gifts. I’m an affiliate, so I will receive a small bribe from amazon for any items purchased, even if it’s not on this list, over the next 48 hours from your click-through. Thanks for watching, reading, and supporting my Thailand adventures.

Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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Dog Day at Dongtan

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie Where They May

Right? Even if it’s right in front of the door at the 7-11 store. This one’s on the corner of Thap Phraya and Jomtien 5 road, at the entrance to the lovely Dongtan gay beach. Here’s a funny story about a doggone of a time I had trying to purchase breakfast there.

IMG_20131109_132840 Let sleeping dogs lay inst

No Need To Bark

This morning, before it turns panting hot, I’m at the 7-11 buying a large yogurt drink, the 22 baht size. A teenage girl with half her hair pulled up on top like a Tibetan temple dog, orders, no, barks at me, to get the small ten baht size. I shrug, and politely try to gesture I want the big one. I can’t understand what Ms. Lion is yapping about, so she hops over the counter and fetches the small one, and scans it in anyway.

Howling Funny

Whatever, I’m not getting into this dogfight at 8am. I hand her the money, and she see’s my perfectly groomed black fingernails with clear glitter overcoat. She giggles, wagging her top-knot back and forth. So I show her the toenails, and she howls with laughter! Every dog has it’s day, right?

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Foaming At The Mouth

Any way, I get home, look at the receipt, and notice the small one was on sale for only three baht. Son-of-a-bitch! For half the price I could have had twice as much. Since this bargain hunting spotter can’t be weaned from a good deal, I’m now foaming at the mouth to race back and fill a dog sled full.

Dog And Pony Show

Thank you so much for stopping by. For more dog and pony show amusements, be sure to subscribe to my email list and be the first to see my latest photo adventures.

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Virtual Pushcart

Please visit my virtual pushcart of Thai books, movies, travel guides, and gifts. I’m an affiliate, so I will receive a small bribe from amazon for any items purchased, even if it’s not on this list, over the next 48 hours of your click-through. Thanks for watching, reading, and supporting my Thailand adventures.

Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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