The Hand On The Knee Thing — Pattaya

Public Transportation

In December of 2008, a fine young gentleman, Chai, was riding with me on the songtaew (aka baht bus) back to Pattaya, Thailand.  He had just spent the day showing me around the infamous Dongtan Gay Beach.

Thailand 2012 2813 Songkran Jomtien Sonteaw wm

Passengers on this songtaew get drenched at Songkran, the Thai water fight festival. Songtaew means two rows, they’re the blue pick up trucks with two rows of seats in the back with an open air roof covering. They cost ten or twenty baht and follow fixed routes on the main roads. They tend to have at least half a dozen passengers, often crammed at rush hour when a dozen or more squeeze on.

No Touching Please

Public displays of affection are considered impolite, gay or straight, in the Kingdom of Thailand. Yet I noticed in Pattaya, Phuket, and other high tourist areas, PDA’s are quite common between farangs (white foreigners) and locals. So I was tickled, flattered, and embarrassed at the same time when Chai placed his hand on my knee during the ride. What a sweet man, I thought.

I found out later, the hand on the knee thing was about something else. Especially in Pattaya, the world capital of sex tourism. There’s more hookers and moneyboys here than noodles in China! On the surface it appears to be an endearing, charming gesture of affection. It’s really about marking territory, warning potential rivals to keep their fangs off of this mealticket!

Spoon Feeding is OK

I was only crushed for a minute or two. Chai was such a delightful gentleman anyway, showing me around, opening doors, carrying heavy packages for me. He introduced me to new exotic foods, spoon feeding me with delicious mystery chicken and shrimp dishes he’d bring from his favorite street vendors.

That happens to me a lot here, the spoon feeding thing. An editor and travel buddy still talks about the dinner at the famous Babylon bath house in Bangkok. There we were, three of us newspaper muckety mucks, and a gorgeous bombshell on the half shell I had met in the “Garden of Secret Delights”. Live jazz tickled our ears. The waiters, fully decked out in formalwear waited on us hand and foot, the four of us just barely covered with bath towels. My geisha of the moment didn’t speak English, or even decent Thai. But he compensated by peeling and spoon feeding me succulent prawns. It was quite the performance.

Why just today, Ran, my current on and off again main squeeze for five years now, spoon fed me some delicious tom ka gai. That’s mushroom, chicken, and several other non-edible to farangs tree stumps, grasses, and spices, swimming in a coconut and chicken broth, sweetened with palm sugar. Aloy aloy (yummy).

Let Sleeping Dogs Lay

The boys do tend to hover and wait on you, hoping to keep you “happeee happeee”, and undistracted by all the other moneyboys vying for your attention. Chai was doing a wonderful job keeping me happy until we had an unfortunate misunderstanding about, money. I won’t bore you with the details, it was five years ago and it’s best to let sleeping dogs lay, right?

IMG_20131109_132840 Let sleeping dogs lay inst

I’ve seen him in Sunnee Plaza on every trip since then, but it was on this trip that we finally sat down and spoke. I was cruising Sunnee again and saw him lounging in one of the beer gardens. He looked great! I waived and wai’d and then moved on, as I had before.

Honor The Good

Five, ten minutes later and I’m still thinking about Chai. Mostly about all the nice times we had. Wouldn’t it be nice to honor that, and let go of the one unhappiness that ended it all?  I turned back, almost racing, to see if he’s still there. He was! I gave him a big smile, and a big hug. And offered him a drink. He graciously accepted, and seemed glad to see me, and that I finally spoke.

11-20-13 Jomtien Curlie-cue flirt 005 Chai adj v sf wm

Still Looks Great

Did I say he still looks great? There he is in a red Ralph Lauren shirt (probably fake), more manly, a bit more filled out, five years has been kind. He still doesn’t speak much English, and my Thai is even more limited. But he did share that Howard’s Guest House was gone, Replaced by a high rise luxury boutique hotel that caters to Muslims.  Howard’s was where I stayed and he worked, and where we met five years ago. Here’s Chai back then:

4-8-2008 jimpix 006 Thailand Pattaya Chai adj sh v sf wm

The Hand On The Knee Thing Again

There’s not much more to talk about after a minute or two of exhausting our miniscule shared vocabulary. But we did sit rather close on the pillowed rattan love seat, looking and smiling at each other a lot. And then the hand on the knee thing, lol.

Mission Accomplished

Five or ten minutes of hands on knees, with a few grabs here, there, and elsewhere, and our drinks are done. I pay the bill, and give him a fat tip. Neither of us brought up the past, nor the future (meaning I didn’t book him for a date, and he didn’t give the sales pitch). A nice long, affectionate embrace, a hand shake, many thank you’s, and I’m out of there. Mission accomplished: I can now think of Chai in a much nicer way. I really enjoyed myself, I hope he did too. All is forgiven (but not forgotten).

More of Jimbo’z Fairy Tales From Afar

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Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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Wish You Were Heeeeeeeeeere…

Relaxation Vacation

I wish all of my friends, including you, my devoted viewers, could join me on my relaxation adventure here on Dongtan Beach, near Pattaya, Thailand. I’m staying at the extremely affordable ($21 a night) DD Inn Guesthouse, just 50 feet off the beach. My typical day consists of waking up around noon, slaving away at my blog, or hanging out at the air conditioned Tuk Com or Central Festival shopping malls where I feast on ice creams and gelatos.

11-5-13 Jomtien sunset boys 111

When the heat breaks, around 4 or 5 pm, I take my new Samsung Galaxy S4 Google Play unlocked international version for a photo adventure on the beach. The goal is to see how many cute guys I can get to let me take their picture.

The Farangs Have Gone

In this video, I’m Having a cold Singha, the national beer of Thailand, in the lime green chairs section. The weather is extremely pleasant, a balmy 85 Fahrenheit. Most of the ugly farangs have gone already, except me, 555 (Thai slang for hahaha, or lol).

What’s left are mostly the concession workers, gorgeous local boys, packing up the chairs and tables, and raking the sand clean of stray trash. The sound of them joking, laughing, and giggling like little schoolgirls is music to my ears. They’re generally quite friendly and eager to have me sit in their section, and ham and pose for as many pictures as I like. There’s even a stray dog at the end who comes over to say hello.

Sorry You Couldn’t Join Me

Since your not sitting here right next to me, thank you so much for dropping in and letting me share this pleasurable sunset moment. Be sure to subscribe, so you can be the first to see my photo adventures as they unfold right here on my splashy photo blog.

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Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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Dongtan Darlings

Sawasdee krap from delightful Dongtan Beach, the mostly gay area of Jomtien. It’s just a stone’s throw from Pattaya, Thailand, the “Extreme City”. Believe it or not, after two and a half weeks, I’ve only made it into town just once for a taste of the wild nightlife. At my age, ha-sip-ha (55), everything I need is within a few hundred feet of my lodging at the DD Inn Guesthouse.

Good cheap food, inexpensive shopping, free wifi, massages on the beach, or in the air conditioned parlors, hot and cold running boys, gay bars ranging from sedately friendly to extremely tactile. Just about anything a fifty plus and gay man, trying to age gracefully, or even dis-gracefully, could need or want is right here on Dongtan Beach.

Rub a dub tub, come and join the club of international tourists and expats, enjoying Thailand’s world class hospitality at Dongtan gay beach, where there’s something for everyone.

I manage to amuse myself here with a nightly sunset joy walk, seeing just how many cute guys I can get to let me take their picture.  There’s no shortage of sweet, friendly, sexy guys perfectly happy to indulge me in my lecherous photo adventures. So I hope you’re also amused, dear viewer, thanks so much for also indulging me!

This is “Boy”. I’m serious, his name is Boy. A delightful princess, always with the latest designer swimwear that leaves just enough for your sordid imagination. He stops by to chat for just a bit, asking how you’re doing, sharing something from his day, and then moving along. Not pushy at all like some of the “moneyboys” can be. He works at one of the bars in Jomtien Complex, and I believe he already have boyfriend.

This fun bunch works at the green chairs.

At the end of each day, the boys must rake and sweep their area clean. A perfect photo opportunity to exploit with my new Samsung Galaxy S4, I got it just for this trip. Do you see, even his t-shirt says so.

This is Panchan, from the yellow chairs, who quietly slipped me his phone number after I was seated and ordered my Singha beer. Haven’t used it yet, I think he’s str8.

Not to be outdone, the next day these boys from the lime colored chairs aggressively courted my business, and gave me bend over backwards and forwards service. Hamming and posing for as many pictures, and videos, as I liked.

I asked if I could borrow his hair.

See what I mean? These guys are probably straight also, but in Thailand, it’s all relative.

I like his style, we could go shopping together.

Nat, and “Boy”, work in the bar downstairs at the DD Inn. I’m guessing that half the boys in Dongtan are named “Boy”, 555 (Thai slang for hahaha, or lol).

Boy is adorably demure.

My Thai boyfriend, Ran. I’ve known him for five years now, and affectionately refer to him as my “mechanic”.  I highly recommend him for head and ball adjustments.

Ran is a bit camera shy.

Back again at the bar downstairs, Boy and (name?).

I can’t resist hopping on the back of a motorcycle taxi with a cute driver like this one. He must have known I was a softy, he asked for 80 baht for what is normally a 60 baht ride. I told him ok since your so cute. I gave him 100 ($3.35) altogether, for letting me snap a few pics.

I wanted to give him a, umm, foot massage, but a pic will have to do.

Creepy but sexy at the same time, look how flattering those uniforms make those crotches, Oh!, I mean cops, look!

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Please visit my virtual pushcart of Thai books, movies, travel guides, and gifts. I’m an affiliate, so I will receive a small bribe from amazon for any items purchased, even if it’s not on this list, over the next 48 hours. Thanks for watching, reading, and supporting my Thailand adventures.

Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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Jomtien Boys Pushing And Pulling…

Man Watching

Watch as these hard working young men clean their concession area of Jomtien’s gay beach, pushing and pulling the sand with rakes and smoothing shovels.

Sweet Service

Every day at the beginning and end of the day, the sand must be swept of trash and debris. This particular section is a favorite of gay tourists: Rit Beach Orange Chairs section 15. To pull in more customers, free wifi is offered, and top notch bend over backwards and forwards service is given by these gorgeous cutie pies. The pie faced sweetie-pie in the hat is especially nice to me, always making sure I have what I need, smiling and batting his eyelashes, why, he even gives me pieces of mint candy!

Anything You Want Meesta?

A minor annoyance at Jomtien Beach are the peddlers, constantly hawking their wares and services, such as porn dvd’s, poppers, viagra, cialis, the latest un-authorised Hollywood releases often before they hit the screens in the US, chachkas, jewelry, watches, ice cream, deep fried seafood, massages, manicures, pedicures, etc.

One item I found quite amusing was a plastic pig that quacked like a duck when squeezed. I want one!

Easy Pushover

At the end of this video, you can see that I’m an easy pushover as I give in to an older woman pedicurist. I remembered her from last year, so I had no problem trusting her with all those sharp and pointy instruments being used on my delicate little tootsies. She did such a good job, on my hands too, all for about $9us. Now I must go and find some black nail polish.

Fun Thai Items On Amazon

Please visit my virtual pushcart of Thai books, movies, travel guides, and gifts. I’m an affiliate, so I will receive a small bribe from amazon for any items purchased, even if it’s not on this list, over the next 48 hours. Thanks for watching, reading, and supporting my Thailand adventures.

Krap khun krap,

Jimmeee

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